Pueblo Community College Strikes Again

Seriously, now, PCC. What in the world do you have against me? Why must you insist on trying to make my life hell? I said I would try to keep it merry around here, and I meant to! But I can't very well do that when you are so hostile, now can I? Why do I hate thee? Let me count the ways.

First, and this is really the most important reason, is this: you're teechers wood pas me eef i wuz riting lik thes. wy i tri too due it rite i do'nt no. Truly, PCC, you have a dizzying intellect. I know I mentioned that before, so I won't elaborate.

Second, and this is why I am so irritated today: You have put me on Financial Aid Suspension. This means that I cannot borrow any more money to complete my Associate of Arts degree. I'll explain why this makes you stupid, and I'll be sure to use small words so that you'll be sure to understand. You wart-hog-faced-buffoon.

1) You denied me any financial aid in the first place, pig. That means you have now suspended me from getting nothing. According to your logic, I should now be getting something. I'll be looking for the check.

2) I have more hours than I should for my program because: I WAS IN A DIFFERENT PROGRAM. Those extra credits don't even apply to this program. I stress the word "different", you miserable, vomitous mass.

3) Your hollow threats will not work on me; I have spent the last few years building up an immunity to soulless savages and most kinds of idiots in general. Check my resume.

At any rate, it matters not, since I will be flipping you the final bird in exactly 4 weeks, but I felt I should say SOMETHING.

Go to hell. Sincerely.