Before I Get Too Far Here, An Aside

After much deliberation and soul-searching, I would like to apologize to my future employers. If you happen to stumble across my opus here and find yourself offended by my writings, and are now considering firing me, please disregard this as temporary insanity which may very well hold up in court right before I counter sue you for discrimination and violating my first amendment rights. Alternatively, you can give me an immediate raise of twice my previous salary for having the inherent boldness to speak (write) my mind. I promise I will never again fail you. Much.